Monthly Archives: December 2011

You Think Your Girl is Loyal?

She’s lyin’
I was whippin’ with her, switch lanes, speed by him
Lean the seat back, Reclinin’
Getting roooooaaaaaaddddddd heeeaaaaaaddddddd…
WHILE SHE’S DRIVING 

I think this is one of the best pictures ever:

Currently trolling the FUCK out of my friend about NGAW, it’s really fun.

So I tried some Superpump a friend of mine offered me, didn’t feel any different, at all. Kind of disappointing.

Dunno what else there is to say, I intend to squat 405 for 5 singles on January 2nd, when my gym re-opens. If this doesn’t happens I’m gonna think long and hard about whether or not I compete at all in 2012.

Bench Press:
290 x 3
PR, finally

Deadlift:
315 x 3 x 1
If anyone’s wondering how it feels to not be able to  deadlift 405 when I used to warm up with it, NOT FUCKING GOOD

Kroc Row:
125 x 2 x 8
Couldn’t be arsed to do more

This song is a real tear jerker. I mean, I didn’t cry, because I’m not a damp, quivering Labia, but it’s as close as I’ve come in a long while.

Alright, no post next week, everyone stay safe and have a good Christmas, I’ll be praying for you.

It’s Okay Amigos

Just let me go
Riding in the rodeo

Tuesday:

Deadlifts: 225 x 15
Feels good man

Bit of upper body mobbing.

Phil Lynott is one of the coolest motherfuckers of all time. I forgot this, but randomly decided to listen to Thin Lizzy as I trained today and it reminded me how fucking awesome he is.

Wrote my last exam yesterday. It could have gone better but it was okay. The CAD portion had me flipping the fuck out because I started the model on the wrong plane and certain functions are only available on the X-Y plane (which is really fucking stupid if you ask me) I ended up wasting 20-30 minutes getting it turned to the correct plane, and managed to finish with 15 minutes left. The fact that one of my friends made 4 different types of cookies for me and a couple others to eat before the exam made the whole ordeal a lot better.

I’ve been asking people my age/around my age what they asked Santa for this year.

Deadlift: 265 x 15
Feels better man. Gonna get 315 x 10 tomorrow and 405 x 5 on Friday.

Jerk: 170 x 10 x 1
Played around with different grips/elbow positions, didn’t like any of them.

Curl: 110 x 2 x 10
Got a real fat bicep pump off these cunts.

Might go out to a pub tonight, which will be the first time I’ve gone out since the end of the summer. It’s fine.

Sleep Finally Appears, I Hold out my Arm to Reach Him

Just to hear my alarm clock going off, Carpe Diem.

Saturday:

Deadlifts: 135 x 25
Anything above this felt real shitty

Sunday:

Deadlifts: 175 x 25
Felt fine. Saw TGWWBCAAP, I doubt she saw me because she was on a treadmill, all of which are right up against the windows. I didn’t see her face but I could tell it was her by the way she moved, by the way her hair shone under the light as it swayed to and fro while she ran. It’s fine.

Studying my ass off for Thermo paid off, or so it would seem. I gave up last night when I found out I only needed 5% on the final to pass as I was completely mentally drained, everything turned out well though because I actually knew what I was doing in the exam and feel like I pulled at least a 75%. I had been sleeping around 5 hours a night for the few days and it was really catching up with me. I was grumpy as fuck at work on Sunday morning, but cheered up a bit in the afternoon. NGAW came in for her shift and showed off her new hair cut. I told her “Wish I cared.” and gave her a cookie.

One exam left, unfortunately ‘Concurrent Engineering and Design’ isn’t as enthralling as the title would have one think. The worst part is that there is no application I can practice, just filling my brain with line after line of shit I don’t care about. The I’m-So-Fat-That-It-Would-Be-Better-For-The-Rest-Of-The-World-If-I-Was-Dead Prof decided that he’d be even more of a piece of shit and not let anyone leave the exam when they finish like every other one in the school, instead making everyone sit in there for the whole 3 hours. I really want to push this guy on his stomach because he’s fat and stocky enough that he wouldn’t be able to get up and would probably behave in a similar way to a turtle on it’s back

Deadlift: 195 x 25
Meh.

Bench: 235 x 8 x 3
Worked on bar path in the last few sets. It makes a huge fucking difference.

Chins: +50 x 5,5,7
Mmmmmmmmm.

I think this is just fucking swell:

I’m a Bulletproof Tiger With Wings

Thursday:

Deadlifts:
135 x 15
185 x 10
245 x 25
The skin on my hands wasn’t too keen on me not using chalk, and I probably should have belted because they got real exhausting. Glute doesn’t feel like I fucked it more though,  so I would imagine evrything’s fine

Today was a pretty good day overall, feel good about my math exam, found out my mum would be fine with Brent and Justin staying with with us if they come to Toronto for another 70’s big seminar, and this happened:

Yes I’m wearing a Santa hat and a tank top, yes I ended the video by saying “70’s Big, Cunt”, yes My friend turned the camera to himself and said “Mmmmmmmmm” and yes I said “Justin, You’re gonna wish you were aborted.” at the top of the third press. Overall I think it’s a pretty sweet video.

Aside from that I’ve  under-slept and under-ate as a result of exams, I also for see more of the same coming over the weekend. Thermodynamics on Monday should be real shitty, then one more final that will be easier. Once that’s over my plans include: Stuffing my fucking face, sleeping 10 hours a day, and letting loose for once in an eternity at New Years.

In other news it’s entirely plausible that I’ll be dressing up Santa on Christmas Eve. I’m kind of excited, it will be fun, and I like kids (not in the way Patrick Stroup looks like he likes kids). It will also be difficult to avoid replacing the traditional “Ho-Ho-Ho, Merry Christmas” with “Soo-Woo” while dressed in a red suit.

Press: 200 x 3
See video.

Deadlift: 255 x 25
Had to take a short break between the first 20 and the last 5, I may or may not have been able to avoid this by sleeping 8 hours, eating more than 600 calories in the 14 hours prior, and having time to ice my ass this morning. It’s fine.

Speaking of Santa Suits
SOULLLLLLLLLLL KHANNNNNNNNNNNNN

She’s the Sort of Ho You See Monday Morning on The Maury Show

I’m sorry, bro
Your shorty goes to glory holes in poorly woven orgy robes
Of course he knows how the story goes when she’s snorting blow
She cracks a 40, yo
Ness
 and Marv got her horny forming and Oreo

So yesterday I found out a girl I’ve worked with for over three years and maybe had a total of five minutes of conversation with in that time, if that, showed her boyfriend, who works with me as well, but has only for a year or so, my old facebook pictures of when I was 120lb to compare to how much bigger I am now. I just think that-Well, it’s-Whatever. It’s fine.

TGWWBCAAP was was leaving the gym as soon as I walked in. Coincidence or not, I don’t wanna talk about it.

Seeing as my fast rehab didn’t work, I guess I’m doing the second hand interpretation by Rip (which I’m confident is accurate) of Starr’s Rehab more precisely. The fact that I won’t do one heavy squat or deadlift until 2012 is very discouraging and makes my want to slide a blade across my carotid arteries, I don’t want to talk about that either.

Deadlift: 185 x 25
Feel real shitty about having to sit down after these. Like, REAL shitty

Jerk: 170 x 10 x 1
Some slack jaw with diamond stud earrings was curling in the rack I jerk out of, so I kicked him out.
Could have been faster.

Wish I could have snatched today, I really wanted  to.

Curl: 110 x 10,9,1
Don’t really care I missed the last rep, I thought it was pretty fucking alpha that my whole body was trembling from how hard I was pulling.
I’ll probably half my rate of weight increase on the curls

This song is real sad and it makes me want to hug my mum:

Punch a Hole in Your Bakery

Getting bread from that quarter-brick.

Thought my glute would be fine by today, it definitely isn’t and I’m fucking pissed off and generally upset about it, basically won’t be squatting or deadlifting heavy until New Years and that could create quite a bit of interference with me breaking world records in May, but, We Gon’ See.

Yesterday was my work Christmas party. I ate what I’d estimate was about 3-3.5lb of food, the turkey sucked taint, it was cold and dry as fuck, everything else I had was real good. I wore jeans, my wolf shirt, which I got a compliment on, and a Santa hat so I was the best dressed by a huge margin. I also had quite a lot of fun which was a good mental break from studying, even though it meant me losing even more sleep over the weekend. I got maybe 17 hours, if that between Friday, Saturday and Sunday, which resulted in me trying to take a nap in my university unsuccessfully. I’m tired as fuck so I can’t tell if it because I was physically uncomfortable or uncomfortable with people walking by, probably staring at me while I sleep. Regardless, I’m pretty confident in what I did on the final and I don’t have another one until Friday so I can relax and sleep tonight.

Squat:
375 x 1- Felt awful
225 x 5
225 x 10

Press: 170 x 8 x 3
Felt great

Deadlift: 225 x 15
I’m starting to think I should be focusing my rehabbing on deadlifts more than squats.

Chins: +45 x 5,5,9
AGL

Alright, gonna go sit on ice for a few hours now, stay safe.

I Could Crack a Joke, but, Crack’s no Joke.

I heard Head I.C.E. say this well over a month ago, and still laugh every time I think of it or hear it.

Saw TGWWBCAAP in the gym again today. Made eye contact at least twice. It’s fine. Then by the time I finished in the gym Carlos had coincidentally posted this on my wall with the caption “Nothing To Say.”

Whatever, this just describes my life to a fucking T (Aside from the stalking part). I’ll just be the fucking loser in the corner, glancing up every minute or so with his headphones turned all the way up playing this far louder than it needs to be:

Training was real shitty today, but seeing as I had maybe 25 grams of protein and 1000 calories in total by the time I trained on top of the fact that my sleep has been shit because I’ve been studying for lame-ass fucking finals, I’ll let it slide.

Squat: 315 x 10
Kinda hurt

Bench 290 x 2
Cunt.

Deadlift: 315 x 10
I was almost like my body was in safe-mode because these felt real tough but only felt it in my glute a little bit.

Kroc Row: 125 x 2 x 12
Tough.

On the plus side I took a fucking dump on my Statics final, I put it in a box and said “EASY!”
See y’all next time.

Brent can Fellate an Old Wrinkly Man

That awkward moment when you can’t tell if the girl who, if in a play would be cast as The Princess, was looking at you because she saw you catching a fat bicep pump or because she heard you cursing out Saul Harris as you caught the aforementioned bicep pump.
Either way eye contact was briefly made and WOW! Nothing happened.

Anyone know how much Percocet it would take to kill a 200lb man?

Studying for finals is slowly killing me anyways, so never mind. As it turns out paying attention in lecture all year is easier than it is to learn everything yourself after lectures end. Then again, two of my courses are taught by the same fucking loser who spends more time talking about what accomplishments he’s made in the fields of study than he does teaching them, and the TA for one of those courses is twice the piece of shit Stankrom could ever aspire to be.

There’s a girl at work who I’m pretty sure is interested in me but she’s fat and ugly, and even more importantly annoying as fuck. I could not be less attracted to her. I’m tempted to just say “I don’t know if you like me or if you’re just weird as fuck, but I’d rather not have any interaction with you regardless.”

Squat: 225 x 15
Kinda hurt, but they were definitely do-able.

Jerk: 170 x 10 x 1
My right knee felt like some one stuck a steel spike through it, so I went and rolled it out until it felt better after words.

Deadlift: 225 x 15
Surprisingly less painful than the squats.

Curl: 107.5 x 2 x 10
Got a real fat pump out of these, but I don’t really care.

Did the best MOBbing I’ve ever done. I feel loose,  relaxed.

Kincain inquires why I don’t increase the weights on my Wednesdays

I do, I increase them 5lb every 6 weeks. If you increase them too often they start to actually stress your body, and then in interferes with recovery for Fridays.

I’ve Always Been a Genuine Person

Test that, get sent to the surgeon.

I spent the whole time I worked this weekend wearing a Santa hat. I’m going to spend my entire shift on Tuesday wearing a Santa hat, and the rest of the shifts I work until Christmas wearing a Santa hat. I’m REAL disappointed that I don’t have access to a Santa Claus costume because if I did I’d be wearing it during my shift on Christmas eve.

I didn’t do any rehabbing over the weekend because it’s fucking boring, I push buggies and lift cases all day (which is about as much work as the rehabbing) anyways, and I was busy working on a fucking lame Thermodynamics assignment.

Facebook girl stopped please responding as of Friday, which is whatever, I just found it odd given that the conversation was seeming to go in a positive direction, what with use talking about baking cookies and stuff. Oh well.

This happened yesterday and it was really fucking awesome:
The part that’s cut off says “Does anyone know how I can get in direct contact with Joss Stone? I wanna ask her out.”

Squat: 135 x 20
Boring, gonna do 2 plates for 15 Wednesday, 3 plates for 10 Friday, and get back to my regularly scheduled programming on Monday

Bench: 240 x 8 x 3
Kind of Slow

Deadlifts: Exactly the same as squats

Chins: 45 x 5,5,8
Mmmmmmmmmmmm

Between sets of chin ups I saw one of my buddies doing a lat spread, I ran over and joined him then turned over and said “Why are we wearing shirts?” quite loudly. He laughed, but not nearly as I did.

Be still my heart
 

If You Wanna Beat Me You Gotta Worship The Devil

I mean really know that dude on a personal level.

This is Stankrom’s blog. If you feel kind of shitty, or have low self esteem you should read it because he’s such a massive piece of steaming shit that you’ll realize you’re actually pretty great in comparison.

This is fucking hilarious.

Yesterday:

Squat:
65 x 25
85 x 20
105 x 20

Really boring, did it in my basement with a shitty 1 inch bar with no bearings, lifting off dipping bars. Ghetto.

Yesterday evening I went to Dairy Queen with my friend before class, he ordered before me and stood right between the cashier and I after his order, and we both just kind of looked at him waiting for him to move. I said “Luke, you’re in the way.” then the pretty cashier smiled at me. That made me feel a little bit better about myself, I smiled back briefly, and made my order. That was it.

I’ve been talking to that girl I mentioned in my Wednesday post on facebook, apparently going into a conversation with no intention other than to make myself laugh works at least kind of well. I’ll see if it goes anywhere.

Today:

Squat:
85 x 25
105 x 20
125 x 20
Bullet through my skull would be nice

Press:
195 x 2, failed on the 3rd rep
<5 minutes later 195 x 3. I gets busy.

Deadlift:
95 x 2 x 20
See squats

Kroc Row:
125 x 2 x 12
Tougher than usual

Hi Nicole, I know you still aren’t reading this.