Monthly Archives: August 2012

You can get with this

Or you can get with that

Nice work eh!

Thank you, sir.

Awesome! Great read and way to stick it to baldylocks. Good luck at The Arnold, maybe get a tshirt made up that says ‘My heels? They are on the fucking floor!’

I don’t know who you are but thanks. I’d rather wear a WPC/CPF shirt, though.

cool lifting. IPF sounds worse than aids.

They had sexy masseuse ladies in the warm up room. There was that.

Here’s what I wanted to write about last week, Why I don’t like people I don’t know/that don’t train knowing about my competing.

Nearly everyone in the 1st world has been inside a gym or lifted some quantified amount of weight, this gives them a reference point. A reference point that is wrong. We’ll get back to why in a minute. Now they have this reference point of what they think is heavy and they compare the numbers I respond with when asked. If I did shot put and said that I could hit 20 meters no one would know what the fuck that means. “Oh you do shot put? You any good?” “My best is 20.3 meters” “cool, bro” mean while that’s world fucking class, but they don’t know what the fuck it means. They think it’s different with powerlifting because they’ve lifted some amount of weight before so they understand and they can say something. In reality they don’t actually know what the fuck they’re talking about. They’ve fucked around and half squatted 95lb for a couple sets so they think they understand what I (we?) do. I could tell these people that I squat 375 and they’d think “I can’t lift that, it must be fucking amazing” when it’s actually shit. I don’t mean to offend anyone who squats 375 or less, but my point is that I know where I stand, and these people don’t, so when they tell me how impressed they are it doesn’t mean anything. I’m not saying saying they’re not impressed, they probably are, I’m saying that they don’t understand what they’re impressed by. I’m someone who tries to avoid judging what I don’t understand, and I think everyone else should do the same.

Anyways, I’m taking a break for a couple weeks until I start training for The Arnold. I’ll be mob’ing and shit.


Burn Rubber All Day

Meet report:

Yesterday/Last night:
Weighed myself around noon, I was 188.5. This made me real fucking nervous, as I knew the more I weighed the higher my Wilks would have to be to qualify for The Arnold. Regardless, I went on my way down to St. Cathrines for the meet, got to the hotel, got settled and went over to the grocery store across the street. I made 5 PB sandwiches and also got Powerade, bananas, Cashews and, the lemon. Went back to the hotel, made the sandwiches and grabbed some fish fry for dinner, all the while drinking tons of water. I ate dinner, watched Taken (Which was fucking great) and ate the lemon, all of it’s insides and half the peel. Went to bed around 2130h, not knowing how much I would weigh in the morning.

Before meet:
Set my alarm for 0630h, woke up at 0610h, took a massive piss and went and laid back down until 0630h. Took a dump and a hot bath to get some sweat going. I luckily weighed in at 82.7kg, probably the heaviest in the 12 man 83kg class. The cool thing about IPF is the 2 hour weigh-ins. They start at 7:30, and go in a specific order, one at a time, so they take about 45 minutes to get to the end of the list, then after you weigh in is equipment check, so it was ~0800h before I got to eat/drink anything. Has some eggs, peameal bacon, potatoes and toast, took another dump, and got ready to go.

Warmed up, felt it in my knees, as usual, went up to a single at 405, belted. Everyone else in my class sucked ass at squats, one guy in a 1-ply suit finished with 2.5kg over my opener, no one else was over 200kg. I opened with 468, smoked it, but didn’t wait for any commands at all, because I’m reckless (read: a fucking idiot) like that, either way it was real fucking easy so I called for 501. Got that reasonably easy, it was a bit slow in the middle, but I had more in the tank. I called 512, to play a bit conservative. I did my usual thing for a third squat, blast music until the bar is ready for me, then put some chalk on my hands (I chalk my back well in advance) storm up to the platform, huff some ammonia and get to it, well, not at the IPF I don’t. I started in on the ammonia and the head judge stood up all upset. I legit said “What, I can’t do that?” and apparently I can’t. So I tried to squat right after that, but failed miserably. Afterwards he came and said if I wanna sniff ammonia I have to do it somewhere that the crowd can’t see because it disrupts their “Peaceful image”

After squats I checked out of the hotel, singlet still on (Side note, I realized that when you’re wearing a singlet and don’t have pockets, you can leave you belt loose and it creates one big front pocket and you keel like a kangaroo) the girl at the front desk asked, verbatim “Was it hard?” I just thought “What a stupid fucking question” and just said that it was still going. I wanted to say “It is now” but, well, I’m me.

Smoked all my warm-ups, felt pretty good, confident I could get a PR, then I go to set up and the head judge tells me my heels have to be on the ground.This fucking RUINED my set up, my arch was fucked and I couldn’t really get my legs into it at all, as I’m short and not terribly flexible. By now I’m wondering what kind of a Chickenshit outfit this is (Shouts to Brent), and missed my opener. I was pretty fucking rattled. I called for the same weight, not being THAT much of an idiot, and it was tough as hell. BRB, Squatting way more than everyone else and struggling to bench 297. Called for 303, and, after another “Heels on the ground” reminder, missed.

Warm ups felt solid, albeit a bit rushed because I went to the warm up room a tad late, then realized I forgot my socks in my bag in the main room. Regardless, pulled up to 315 for a single, knowing I had a low opener. 440 was easy to open with, Called 490. The guy in second place benched a lot more than me and was now only 7.5kg behind, he called for enough to tie me, which would have him take first by body weight as long as I missed 490. Lick my taint you dirty bald fuck, you’re equipped and hoping that a raw 20 year old kid misses so your grown-ass can get first. I made 490, putting me in first by 22.5kg assuming he made his 3rd, which he did. Two other people tied him, though, and one was lighter, so he ended up 3rd place. I took a swing at 500, missed somewhere around the knee, but didn’t really care because my Wilks was 390 and I was ahead by 50lb.

Stood on the top of the podium, I didn’t really smile, but my tank top did:

I won first place in the 83kg class (Field of 12) Best Junior lifter across all classes. I could have lifted more, but I’m going to The Arnold, so I’m satisfied.

The .40 got a Silencer

That shit sound like it`s hissing.

I have something to write about, but don`t have time, I`ll get to it eventually.

Good luck this weekend. Please stay safe. I’ll be attempting to find 3rm for squat bench dead today so if you want to float some good vibes this way that would be cool but if not that’s cool too. Either way, either way. Hoping to go 170-180kg on squat, 260-275lb on bench, and I suspenct deads will be in the 190-200kg rang since I haven’t been hitting them too much lately… Because I know you were curious and gave a shit and all.

Hey man, if you`re training hard, and you`re making some progress, I definitely don`t mind hearing about it. Best of luck, and stay safe

Squat: 405 x 1

Bench: 245 x 1

Deadlift: 405 x 1
Slower than I expected, but I was real, real hungry, to the point where I stomach hurt while I lifted during the squat and pull.


Been drinking a lot of water lately, 5L yesterday, 6L today, etc.

My body is starting to feel pretty ready.


Squat 315 x 5

Bench: 225 x 5

Deadlift 315 x 5

Singles tomorrow at 4 plates for squat and pull, 245 for bench

I Woke up Today like ‘Fuck the World’

Nah, I’m too late the world is fucked.

I’m pretty sure ammonia is a requirement for zumba’ers. Its probably a waste of time though, we’re white… No rhythm… Just another opportunity to fail miserably. SEE YOU THERE

Just realized we can do Zumba in Zubaz, let’s go.

Have you considered a split routine?

Yes, I’ve been working on programming for after my meet, but right now preparing for next Saturday is the Priority.

Yesterday I went real, real, light, Monday I’m gonna go pretty light, then Wednesday I’ll go through to top warm-ups like I typically would.

I’m planning to squat 469 First attempt, real conservative, then 502 second, and depending on the speed/feel of that either 512 or closer to 520.

Bench will be 292, 308, then either 314 or closer to 320, again dependent on the second.

Deadlift I’ll open at 440, then second will be whatever I need to wilks 390, I’m presuming it will be around 470, hopefully a bit less, then I’ll probably go for 500 on my third.

I looked up results of the last meet this federation held and it didn’t say ‘Classic’ which is their way of saying raw. If those numbers are from Single ply lifting then everyone in that federation sucks dick at PL and should find a new hobby.

Squat: 225 x 3 x 5

Bench: 185 x 3 x 5
Paused every rep significantly

Deadlift: 225 x 5

My Regime will let the Rrrrrrrifle Squeeze

I’m in real, real rough shape as far as recovery goes, need to talk to some people about programming for the next week and a bit to prep for the meet, basically all I’ve done is fail a few squats since Friday.

Go for 3 plates on that bench. But seriously I hope it comes back fairly quickly once i can start up again. I can bench pretty soon after surgery hopefully so at least I wont be a complete lazy fuck.

Depending on how 310 goes at the meet for my second I’ll be going 315 or 320

Just started doing triples. It’s a good feel. Maybe one day I really will be able to squat 400, still won’t be a “real man” though… Slits wrists and bleeds out on the platform… It’s more poetic than hanging one’s self, IMO anyway. K, keep it fresh, laters.

Just give up lifting and do Zumba with me. They allow ammonia in Zumba, right?

They say the Good Die Young

Well, I got a long time before my time comes

About 225


Obhhhhhhhhhhh…. Don’t I feel like a wanker now.

Yeah, bro, you’re better than that.

Injuries suck mang. I’m going to have surgery for a cam hip impingement later this year so no squatting or deads for a long, long time. Typical return to activity is 4 months plus, brb killing self.

It’s shit on the one hand, but getting strong again is at least a decent feeling.

I think I’ll just chalk it up to having a shitty day,

Squat: 520 x 0, 500 x 0

Bench: 310 x 1

Deadlift: 480 x 0

Off the wall, And I’m Smiling for all the Wrong Reasons

I’ll have an eyeball tipping the scales just to get even

Big Mac:
Don’t be mad about your deadlift, I squatted 580 and deadlifted only 455 today. It’s fine.

It’s a little frustrating, but I’m a lot more patient than I would expect myself to be. What do you weigh now? That squat is dece.

Hey man I’ll be the guy in the corner still squatting baby weights, but I’ll ready this for some motivation.

Hope you get at b t dubs pretty soon or I’ll slit my own wrists.

B-T-Dubs was me bastardizing “BTW”, the acronym was BH. She wasn’t at the gym when I was there today, so the only explanation is that she got offended by me not being a gentleman and insisting she go first in Monday’s anecdote and went to a new gym because she never wants to see me again.

Snatch: 155 x 5 x 1, 165 x 5 x 1
Pretty sure I only pressed one out, took a swing at 175, it didn’t work.

Klokovs: 165 x 5 x 1

Didn’t curl or chin because I was running late as a result of pooing and having to wait for a platform.