Monthly Archives: March 2014

Post-Modern Bobby Oppenheimer

Watch, I’m ‘bout to cross the wires.

Bench: 322.5 x 2, 335.5 x 2, 342.5 x 2, 285 x 8
First rep of first two paused, third was slightly slow because I chunned my set up and ended up with my hips in a position that gave me literally zero leg drive.

Press: 225 x 3

Skull Crushers: 140 x 2 x 9
Bit tough

Curls: (50, 40, 30) x 2 x 8
Bit easy


All I eat

Is Pussy and Collard Greens

Bench: 285 x 3 x 5
Surprisingly fast/smooth for only sleeping 4 hours. And by that I mean average.
Slanger: 295 x 9
10th was close-ish.

Press: 185 x 3 x 5
Been having my shoulders feel kinda wonky at the insertion to my pecs since late Jan/early Feb and press volume is the only thing I’ve changed, so I bumped it back up a tad.

Neck Curls: 55 x 20, 20, 25

Chins: +100 x 5, 5, 7

Squat: 410 x 3 x 5
Felt heavy, but they were still pretty fast.

SLDL + Shrug: 355 x 3 x 5
Last 2 reps weren’t shrugged because my fucking strap ripped in two. Mm.

Rows: 295 x 3 x 5
Felt pretty hooked up despite being distracted/hating myself due to the pretty ginger girl behind me. It’s fine.

Started with a Dollar and a Dream

Ended with 2 pennies and a nightmare.

Squat: 490 x 2
Last warm up felt like absolute shit, first rep felt worse, 2nd was the slowest I’ve done in a long time. Felt pretty light headed for 20 minutes afterwards. I’m gonna call it a shit day and still go for 5 plates in two weeks because it’s still not PR territory.

DE Deadlift: 385 x 10 x 1
Injury was on fire the whole time, had to take a knee after rep 4.

Back Extension: 130 x 3 x 5

Stiff Leg Deadlift: 170 x 3 x 8
Last rep was sooooo rough. Got a blister from them, too, so that’s good.

Got a Bitch so Bad

She ain’t never been on Santa’s list

Bench: 320 x 2, 330 x 2, 340 x 2, 285 x 8
Everything was fast except the descent of the first working rep. Paused first reps of sets 1 & 2.

Mid workout poops are great because you’re already warmed up and you have TP right there to wipe your sweat.

Press: 225 x 3

Decline Skull Crushers: 140 x 8, 7
I dunno. Not that it really matters that much

Curls: (50, 40, 30) x 2 x 8
Phhhhaaaaaaaaat pump

I’m Just Reckless, Young, and Hella Drunk

You could prolly smell my breath and catch a buzz

Bench: 285 x 3 x 5
Could have been a bit faster, but not too bad. First reps paused.
W/ Slingshot: 295 x 9
9th lockout was a bit slow so I didn’t bother trying a tenth.

Press: 185 x 3 x 5
Felt slightly yucky. Still real fast, though.

Neck Curls: 55 x 3 x 20
Need my shit looking like a tree stump.

Chin-ups: +100 x 5, 5, 7
Slow for some reason, dunno. I think I slept pretty shit last night.

Squats: 410 x 3 x 5
3rd was about average, first two were pretty breezy.

SLDL: 355 x 3 x 5
Bit tough, but they usually are the week following heavy pulls.

Rows: 295 x 3 x 5
Bit tougher than they’ve been the past couple weeks.

I’m Great

With a thousand flaws, I think I found ‘em all.

Deadlifts: 495 x 1 x 5
All of them were decently fast, and felt good, etc. My hetero life partner/swolemate said that my hips shot up on 2, 3, and 4, though, which seems to be typical when I’m feeling my injury. Also tore my hand open for the first time ever. I ripped a callus off yesterday and it tore the skin off hella deep, so I was kinda of expecting it.

Squats: 300 x 6 x 2
Probably going to Lmao3Plaet next time.

Back Extensions: 120 x 3 x 5
Definitely need to be moving these up in weight.

Pinch Grip Deadlifts: 165 x 8, 170 x 2 x 8
I thought I was definitely gonna rip my hand all the way open with these, but it was fine. Cool.

Face Covered in Blood

Balls bigger than Wilson

Bench: 317.5 x 2, 327.5 x 2, 337.5 x 2, 285 x 8
First rep of the first two sets paused, felt good. 9th was allegedly close on the back off.

Press: 225 x 3
Came waaaaaaaaay out of path on the third out of the bottom. ‘sokay, doe.

Decline Skull Crushers: 150 x 2 x 9

Curls: (50, 40, 30) x 2 x 8
Dat pump.

Hate it When They Ask me How I’m Doing, Though

Lie and say I’m good when I’m moving slow
I’m losing hope

Bench: 285 x 3 x 5
Felt decent, like not hard or slow at all, just a little bit off. I think my circadian rhythm is in shambles, though, so that might be it. Paused first rep of last set because I need to start practicing some pause work for Nats.
With Slingshot: 295 x 9
Didn’t go for a 10th because me spotter didn’t look very useful.

Press: 185 x 3 x 3 
No problems

Neck Curls: 50 x 3 x 30

Chin-Ups +100 x 5, 5, 7
Back to chins to help bicep strength for benge presh

Squat: 410 x 3 x 5
These were so unbelievably hooked up with the exception of the very last rep, where I came out of path. The first set legitimately didn’t even feel like I had a bar on my back.

SLDL + Shrug: 355 x 3 x 5
Sets 1 and 3 were hooked up, 2 felt a little funky.

Rows: 295 x 3 x 5
Hooked up.

Loose Lips

Get your feet tied to bricks
Have some face time with the fish

Squat: 485 x 3
EZPZ, despite more shitty sleeping

Speed Deadlifts: 380 x 10 x 1
Couple were a bit slow, most were fast.

Back Extensions: 120 x 3 x 5
Took these a bit deeper than usual, first two sets were easy, last wasn’t

Pinch Grip Deadlifts: 165 x 3 x 8
Last set was torture.

It’s Just

Asses to Asses, Butts to Butts

Bench: 315 x 2, 325 x 2, 335 x 2, 285 x 8
Didn’t really feel like I did much. Deloads suck. Might have taken the bar a little asymmetrical on the back off. I’ve noticed for the past little while that my biceps are twitchy on my descent of the first rep of all my heavy work, and it get slowed down as a result. I’m taking that as a sign that I need stronger biceps.

Press: 225 x 3
Pretty damn easy.

Decline Skull Crushers: 140 x 2 x 8
Hella tough for some reason.

Curls: (50, 40, 30) x 2 x 8
What I do here is like two rounds of a drop set with db curls. By the end I had the biggest pump ever and I could barely hold on to the dumbbells.