Monthly Archives: July 2014

Put your Dawg in a Bag

Like Rich White Chicks.

Bench: 345 x 2, 355 x 2, 365 x 2, 290 x 8
I had to check the bar twice after the first set because it felt so light I thought for sure I had misloaded. Still only had 8 on the backoff.

Press: 225 x 4
Yop

Tate Press: 65 x 2 x 8
Felt wild hard for some reason.

Curls: (50, 40, 30) x 2 x 8
Phhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmp

Advertisements

So I put a Hole in Him;

Like a woman’s bike seat.

Bench: 290 x 3 x 5
Had to go to my gym near work because of coordination issues for the date, which is about to pop off, and I had to use the bench I can barely reach, so unracking was mad shakey. Felt good once I got it out though.
Slingshot: 300 x 8
Dece for 5 hours sleep.

Press: 185 x 3 x 5
Better than the last few weeks.

Neck Curls: 50 x 3 x 25
Had to catch dat neck pump before my date imo.

Chins: +100 x 5, 5, 8
Chin up bar at this gym is straight dookie.

Squats: 405 x 3 x 5
Bent bar lyfe, it happens, still easy, really tired and hungry.

SLDL + Shrug: 365 x 3 x 5
First set was real easy, but they got quite a bit harder.

Rows: 300 x 3 x 5
Turnt.

If Imelda Marcos saw my Kick Collection

She’d probably get a clit erection.

Squat: 500 x 3
Using intensity day as the first time to ever squat in my new shoes may have been a terrible idea, but despite things being a little shaky, it’s all over now.

Deadlift: 390 x 10 x 1
Felt pretty good, especially the first few.

Back Extensions: 140 x 3 x 5
Easy as fuck for some reason.

Pinch Grip Deadlifts: 145 x 3 x 8
Not easy as fuck.

Choke You Out, I’m Italian;

I talk with my hands.

Bench: 342.5 x 2, 352.5 x 2, 362.5 x 2, 290 x 8
Woop de woop

Press: 225 x 3
Forgot how much that back off bench set fatigues me.

Tate Press: 65 x 2 x 8
Bit slow, whatever.

Curls: (50, 40, 30) x 2 x 8
10/10 pump.

Touring ‘Round the World Telling Heauxs to say “Ahhh”

Sound it out

Bench: 290 x 3 x 5
Smooth and fast. Ice.
Slingshot: 300 x 9
Path was a bit sloppy on a few.

Press: 185 x 3 x 5
Felt good, way better than the last 2 week. The girl’s basketball team being in the gym definitely didn’t hurt my will to make my pressing look good.

Neck Curls: 50 x 20, 25, 25
Although these probably made them think I’m fucked in the head.

Chins: +100 x 5, 5, 8
Felt pretty dece.

Squat: 405 x 3 x 5
Squatted with a bar that was legit bent by an inch+ on both sides. I left work late and couldn’t be fucked to wait for a good one. Easy as fuck regardless.

SLDL + Shrug: 365 x 3 x 5
Way better than the last couple weeks, but still could have been easier.

Rows: 300 x 3 x 5
Pretty easy.

Now go Wash Your Filthy Hands

And get in line to stroke the beard

Deadlifts: 495 x 5 x 1
HEY GUYS, MARK HERE WITH A LIL KNOWLEDGE DART, IF YOU SPEND YOUR MORNING OUT IN THE SUN PLAYING 18 HOLES OF GOLF (WHICH AFTER HAVING PLAYED IT I CAN DEFINITIVELY SAY ISN’T A FUCKING SPORT) IT’S GONNA MAKE YOUR DEADLIFTS THAT YOU DO IMMEDIATELY AFTER REALLY FUCKING TOUGH.

Squats: 315 x 6 x 2
Last set could have a bit faster, rest were dece, but I wanted to puke between them.

Back Extension: 140 x 3 x 5
Decent

Pinch Grip Deadlifts: 145 x 3 x 8
Hands were fried by the time I got to these.

Curious George Eating a Meal on the Internet

THAT’S A BANANA CLIP

Bench: 342.5 x 2, 352.5 x 2, 362.5 x 1
Guess that’s what my dumb ass gets for sleeping like shit all week. Stomach felt wonky all morning, too.

Press: 225 x 3
Felt kinda slow, so I didn’t go for more.

Tate Press: 65 x 2 x 8
Meh.

Curls: (50, 40, 30) x 2 x 8
At least the most important lift felt good.

Hippity-Hop Niggas Wan’ Rap in the Booth Cute

Meanwhile I got crack stashed up in the deuce-chute

Bench: 290 x 3 x 5
Was hoping for a little bit more speed, but nothing to complain about.
Slingshot: 300 x 9
Messed up the path on the first rep.

Press: 185 x 3 x 5
Again, a bit too slow for my liking.

Neck Curls: 50 x 20, 20, 25
Tree Trunk Lyfe.

Chins: +100 x 5, 5, 7
Felt 1000x better than last week.

Squat: 405 x 3 x 5
Pretty sure I fell asleep during the second set because of how fucking boring and easy these were.

SLDL+Shrug: 365 x 3 x 5
These were really fucking tough though. I dunno.

Rows: 300 x 3 x 5
Tougher than the squats, easier than the pulls.

Just Bought a New Choppa With a Shoulder Strap;

And I’m about to put a body on it like a Yoga Mat.

Squat: 495 x 3
Figured this was a stupid place to start my training cycle, so I did it anyway. Pretty easy, especially the last one.

DE Deadlifts: 390 x 10 x 1
Could have had a bit more pop on the last ones.

Back Extension: 140 x 3 x 5
I missed these.

Pinch Grip Deadlifts: 145 x 3 x 5
I didn’t miss these, but my hands were starting to look like a normal person’s again so I figured I should do them anyway.

I Hated When my Moms Joined the Neighbourhood Watch,

I put crack on the street and let the neighbourhood watch
I said I’ma be somebody in this neighbourhood, watch
Started takin’ everybody in the neighbourhood watch

Bench: 340 x 2, 350 x 2, 360 x 2
Completely forgot I do a backoff set on these until right this minute. It happens. Probably better off without that volume on the first week of the cycle anyway.

Press: 225 x 4
Didn’t have the 5th, as I came out of path on the 3rd.

Tate Press: 65 x 2 x 8
Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezey

Curls: (50, 40, 30) x 2 x 8
Difficult Difficult Lemon Difficult.